It’s one thing for a restaurant to be cavalier about serving fatty, fried foods and feces-coated meat that has to be served well-done (to burn the bacteria off) without giving a shit about your health, but it’s quite another for an eating establishment to gloat about its menu and the resultant health consequences of eating artery-clogging, cholesterol-laden burgers loaded with saturated fats by calling itself the ‘Heart Attack Grill’. But that’s precisely what one burger chain restaurant had the cojones to do, and for once, a restaurant has lived up to its advertising.

Hahaha, I get it. Heart Attacks are Funny!

On Saturday night, a man suffered a heart attack while dining at the Heart Attack Grill. According to Bridgett, one of the waitresses who works there, the man complained of chest pains shortly after taking a few bites out of his ‘Triple Bypass Burger’ (I’m not making this up — see the Menu)

The restaurant chain, whose gimmick is mocking the millions of (predominantly overweight) Americans who die of heart attacks each year by poking fun at heart disease, has its waitresses dress up as scantily clad ‘nurses’ and calls its owner a ‘doctor’.

So it was no surprise that neither the owner, a “Doctor” Jon Russo or his staff or fellow patrons took the matter seriously.

Basso told Fox News, “One of the nurses came back to me and said, ‘Dr. Jon, we’ve got a patient who’s in trouble.” Basso called 9-1-1 and EMTs arrived shortly thereafter and were able to stabilize and treat the victim, who is alive and enjoying his 15 minutes of fame.

The restaurant, which just opened in October 2011 boasts a menu that includes such items as ‘Flatliner Fries’ and ‘Bypass Burgers’. Using basic math, one can quickly derive that a single meal at Heart Attack Grill can easily exceed 7500 calories. And while one meal there probably won’t be enough to induce a full scale coronary, it’s certainly a step in the right direction. And by ‘right direction’ I mean ‘the grave’.

Like Planet Fitness, which mocks its own members’ efforts to get into shape by offering them free bagels, pizzas, and candy, Heart Attack Grill offers FREE meals to customers who are dangerously obese — that’s right — patrons over 350 lbs eat FREE!

Seriously, Heart Attack Grill owners: If you’re going to facilitate the death process like Dr. Kevorkian, perhaps you could at least offer life insurance as a menu option to go with the deep-fried, beer-battered onion rings?

Keeping in tune with the dark humor and tasteless concept, the victim’s fellow patrons, passersby and customers did nothing to help him — unless by ‘help, you mean whipping out their iPhones and Androids and taking photos and videos of what could easily have been the man’s final breaths.

“Tourists were taking photos of him as if it were some type of stunt,” Basso said, adding that they would never go that far to make the news.

Quadruple Bypass Anyone? Bwahahaha!

Sure, Dr. Jon, whatever you say. Keep telling yourself that you sent out Press Releases to the national media to warn diners of the dangers of unhealthy food and not to drum up attention and business for your restaurant. Someone just might believe you.

In case you think this whole thing is just a publicity stunt, here’s an actual video of the man being taken to the ambulance on a gurney.

It should also be noted that 550 lb. Heart Attack Grill spokesman Blair River died last year at the age of 29. Hahaha! Get it! Their spokesman was so fat, he dropped dead! Oh, lordy! I can’t stop laughing. And neither can the Heart Attack Grill. All the way to the bank.

Somehow our Senior Editor Shane Ray was able to corral not just Craig Golias, but his incredibly hot and sexy girlfriend Gizel into sitting down for an interview. After leaving Prime Steakhouse and Goliath behind at the Bellagio, Shane hopped into his waiting limousine and headed straight for Spearmint Rhino, where he was ushered to a VIP table and served a complimentary bottle of Dom Perrignon. Minutes later, he was joined by Gizel, looking spectacularly smoking in a slinky gold dress that left little to the imagination.

In a world of figure, fitness and bikini girls spending their lives on Facebook, trying to get their protein shakes in and their bowel movements out, Gizel is a breath of fresh air — living the high life in both Vegas and NYC — unworried about her protein intake and insisting that she hasn’t pooped in nearly a decade. In short, Gizel Rodriguez is just our kind of girl. So much so, that if you read between the lines here, it actually looks like our dear Shane is trying to run some game on her. See for yourself!

MW:  Would you consider yourself a Sin City Las Vegas Girl or a Big Apple NYC Girl?

Gizel: I’m definitely a Big Apple girl .You can take the  girl out of NYC but you cant take NYC out of the girl!

MW: NY Mets fans or NY Yankees fan?

Gizel: I don’t watch sports.

MW: Have you ever gone out with Alex Rodriguez?

Gizel: Who? (Laughs)

MW: Alex Rodriguez? A-Rod? The dude who dates all the supermodels? Is he of any relation to you?

Gizel: No, but I wish he was!

MW:  Speaking of, you’re nickname is G-Rod. Did Alex steal that moniker from you?

Gizel: I dont think so.  My family calls me Gigi.

MW: That’s not so bad, Gigi.  Try having your family call you ‘Blockhead’.

Gizel: (Laughs) (Reaches out and strokes interviewer’s bald head) I think it’s cute.

MW: (Blushing) How long have you been modeling?

Gizel: Seven years.

MW: Is it something you always wanted to do?

Gizel: Not really…it was something that i just tried and it took a life of it own.

MW: Some of your pics out there are a little risque. Have you ever wanted to model for Playboy?

Gizel: I  think I’m too curvy for Playboy so no, I’ve never really thought seriously about trying out.

MW: Have you ever been to Hugh Hefner’s Playboy Mansion?

Gizel: Yes, I have been there twice.

MW: Any Scott Baio or Pauly Shore stories?

Gizel: (Giggles) I promise to tell a story about one of them in my next interview!

MW: MuscleWeek is a bodybuilding-themed website. Do you normally find yourself attracted to bodybuilders or regular civilians?

Gizel: I like guys that take care of themselves and bodybuilders tend to do that.

MW: Do you mean a dude with some guns and a six pack or a massive muscle douche?

Gizel:  (Laughs) Well, I seem attract monsters! (Giggles) Maybe because my body is so over the top as well!

MW: I wouldn’t call it ‘over the top’ — but then again I’m used to dating strippers. So tell me, does anybody on MuscleWeek have ANY shot with you and if so who?

Gizel: I’m not so sure because you guys are always joking and none of you guys seem to take anything seriously. I want a man that knows when to make me laugh and knows when to get real.

MW:  Okay, I’m serious as a heart attack. Look into my eyes and tell me if you had to pick one of us, it would be me, right?

Gizel: (Blushing)

MW: What is the cheesiest pick-up line you have ever heard in a bar or club?

Gizel: Probably the one you just used! (Laughs)

MW: I can tell you’re falling for me, but I’m still on the fence about you. So tell me something about Gizel that not many people know about?

Gizel: I am very shy and quiet. People always think am this crazy girl because of my shoot and picture  and the way I carry myself when I am out but that’s just for work. It’s a persona  and not who I am when I’m home.

MW: Outside of glamour and the glamorous nightlife, tell us what else interests you?

Gizel: Spending time with my family and friends. Shopping, traveling, dinner, movies…I just love being home and playing with my three puppies.

MW: Do you have any obscure hobbies?

Gizel: I know this will sound weird but I love cleaning. I’m a clean freak!

MW: Then it’s definitely not gonna work out between us because I’m a dirty freak!

Gizel: (Laughs) You’re funny!

 MW: If you found a magic lamp and out came a Genie and he gave you ONE wish. What would that ONE WISH be?

Gizel: I would wish for a billion more wishes to make!

 MW: That’s pretty sneaky. I see what you did there. What was your highlight of 2011?

Gizel: Buying a house in New York.

 MW: Do you have any plans or goals for 2012?

Gizel: To take more time out to relax. 2011 was a very busy year for me.

 MW: You seem to travel a lot. Any places in the world you absolutely love to visit?

Gizel: Paris and Hawaii.

 MW: Are you coming to Chicago anytime soon?

Gizel: I haven’t been to Chicago in a long time but I’ll let you know when I’m coming back so you can take me out!

MW: Well I’m flattered,  but I’m engaged to be married so I’ll have to take a rain check on that.

Gizel: Engaged? What does she look like? Show me a photo!

MW: (Pulls up photo on Blackberry)

Gizel: Ohhhhh my. She’s so sexy!

MW: So tell me, if you were stranded on a desert island and had to bring with you only THREE ITEMS. Which items would they be?

Gizel: My iPhone. My puppies. And some Mint Creme Oreos!

MW: What is your favorite website?

Gizel: Gizel.net (laughs) and of course MuscleWeek!

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So here’s the scoop — the interview was supposed to continue for another 15-20 minutes, but Shane being the PUA he is, chose to drop an Artificial Time Constraint (ATC) on Gizel and tell her that he had to interview Tera Patrick at the Venetian, so the interview was cut short in the name of Seduction. Regardless, Gizel is the exclusive Bikini Model of MuscleWeek and we’re happy to be able to spend quality time with such a quality woman.